So, now I'm a fiscal terrorist

At first I was offended; the lamestream media, Vice President What's-his-face, and other pundits on the Left have taken to calling TEA Party folk like me 'Terrorists" (I guess they got tired of calling us racists). Generally speaking, I don't like being compared to a wacko whose idea of a good time is to strap bombs around his waste and blow himself and others into little bits.

In my outrage over the latest verbal assault from the Left, I turned as I often do - no, not to a schematic of how to build a human bomb - but to my trusty Merriam-Webser's Collegiate Dictionary (Tenth Edition). There, I sought the solace from this latest verbal assault and the definition of this word that has caused the Left so much angst over the last 10 years or so: a word they struggle to use against human bombers but so easily apply to fiscal conservatives.

Reading the definition, I suddenly realized that, maybe, they're right. Maybe I am a terrorist.

According to Webster, a terrorist is someone who uses "systematic ... terror ... as a means of coercion."

I will not deny that the TEA Party, through its elected officials, has sought to coerce, cajole or otherwise convince the government to apply some fiscal sanity to our burgeoning debt crisis. Considering, if someone finds fiscal conservatism to be a form of terror, than seeking some restraint on government spending could be a terrifying experience.

I like to think of this in terms of a family setting. Joe and Cindy Somebody have found themselves up to their necks in debt and Joe has decided it's time to take a stand.

"Cindy, we have got to stop spending like this."

Suddenly, the neighbors peer through the window shades to see why Cindy next door has run into the street screaming as though chased by a knife wielding psychopath. And there's Joe, sitting at the kitchen table with a shocked look at his face wondering what happened to make his wife act that way.

If spending within our means or trying not to saddle our children and grandchildren with our irresponsible debt is so incredibly frightening for liberals, maybe we should make the same suggestion to them that Joe will most likely make to Cindy when she stops running.

"Honey, I love you, but if being responsible about the way we spend money has that affect on you, maybe I should handle the finances from now on. I mean, honestly, if we don't do something about this now, the alternative is bankruptcy and ruin. Besides, the neighbors are starting to talk, what with you running around screaming every time I suggest balancing the budget."

So, as a fiscal terrorist, I apologize to Biden, Chris Williams and all the other liberals who find my position so scary. If we had known you were so incapable of handling money within the bounds or reality, well, maybe more of us would have refrained from putting you in these frightening positions where you'd be called upon, by some, to deal with issues like debt, income and fiscal responsibility.

They say the first step is admitting there's a problem. Now that we've identified the problem, maybe you should focus on things that are a little more comfortable for you, such as attacking Sarah Palin just because she's a woman with too much sense to be a liberal.

In the meantime, as the next election approaches, keep in mind that, if people are careless enough to put you back in office, you'll probably have to deal with scary financial matters again. If you're not up to the task, maybe you should let someone with a stronger stomach and a little more common sense do the job.